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The Eleventh Promise pertains to the manner in which we approach difficult situations. More specifically, the Eleventh Promise focuses on situations that caused us frustration in the past. After working the Twelve Steps and building up our principles, we now find that we often handle things differently. We no longer buckle under pressure every time life hands us a tough decision. Recovery teaches us to make better choices and to stick by them, even if doing the wrong thing might technically result in a better outcome. But, much like the rest of the Twelve Promises, we must work to reach this point.
Note that the Eleventh Promise, like the rest of the Twelve Promises, often blossoms around the time we work on Step Nine. For many addicts and alcoholics, making amends might top the list in terms of difficult situations. Nonetheless, we do what we must for the sake of our sobriety. And when we experience the joy of setting things right, we decide to apply this moral standard to the rest of our affairs as well. Some addicts might start doing this long before Step Nine. Either way, the result will be a much better way of life.
If we work toward the Eleventh Promise, we can prevent such circumstances. We find that many of the situations that caused us emotional disturbance in early recovery seem to affect us very little once we get some more time under our belts. Some situations will still get under our skin quite a bit. But as long as we keep our heads high and our feet planted, we can get through any circumstance with our dignity intact.
When we fulfill the Eleventh Promise, honesty should no longer require any effort on our part. We do the right thing naturally. It becomes easier to live with confidence, because we no longer carry the burdens of our constant lies. Even after working Step Nine, we find that we must occasionally make amends to someone. Perhaps we neglected to come clean with this person the first time around, or perhaps we harmed them recently. Either way, we now know that our only option is to clean our side of the street. This may still be troubling, but far from baffling. At this point in our recovery, we know precisely how to handle these sorts of situations.
If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.
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